from such great heights

wake up conversation

Posted in life by chapwoman on December 2, 2008

tonight i had an interesting conversation with a girl i know.  she recently broke up with her boyfriend and before hearing about it, i thought she had this amazing relationship with him.  so i asked her why she decided to call it off and she simply replied, “I wasn’t at peace.”

“i wasn’t at peace.”

what does that mean? (she’s ambiguous like that.)

but she continued saying that things were going great with him, yet she “wasn’t at peace.” and after severing that relationship, she instantly felt a weight lifted from her shoulders, much lighter and in-sync with the Lord.

i’m still puzzled at this point, because why would anyone end a relationship when it’s supposedly going well? i’ve seen several relationships blossom and fall apart this year, but the endings are particularly mysterious because many of them have ended when “things were great.”

but then she said something profound, something that propelled me to write this post: “I know that God has something amazing planned for me, someone amazing he’s holding onto for me until the right time, so I’m just excited to see what that looks like later.  But for now, He wants me to be single.”

and i sunk down in the drivers seat, feeling a little ashamed.  ashamed of envying my girlfriends with boyfriends, ashamed of my impatience with God in the relationship department, ashamed of my lack of faith in general.  here we just had Thanksgiving, but i’m so unthankful for all the meaningful things God has blessed me with that I don’t deserve: a brain, a great education, awesome family & friends, passion.  i laugh at how i put myself before Christ because He is the only one that matters and the only one who should matter.

but I love how Jesus speaks. even if it’s through a single sentence, in a single conversation, with a girl i don’t even know that well.  He’s speaking all the freaking time, and slapping some sense into the faithless.  Confronting me and comforting me in the same moment.

C’est la vie,


2 Responses

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  1. anna said, on December 2, 2008 at 10:29 pm

    so glad you decided to blog again. also, i love you. we should attempt one more date before christmas. just throwing that out there. cheers.

  2. Partner for Life said, on December 12, 2008 at 8:43 am

    i love this post. it really spoke to me.

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