from such great heights

May it be.

Posted in life by chapwoman on April 30, 2008

So April flew by without warning me and I’m still processing that May is already upon me. In 40 minutes.

May is a very special 31 days of the year and it’s taken me the blink of April to realize it. May is the 5th month of the year, which basically says, “hey! get your year together. you only have 7 months left.” It’s the month of birthdays. LOTS of birthdays, including those of my beloved Alaska, roommate, and an embarrassing high school infatuation. In this month we celebrate our mothers, we celebrate some type of Memorial, we celebrate an entire dia de mayo for another culture.

The past couple of years, I’ve remembered May as being the heaven and hell of AP Tests and prom, so this year I want to cherish it and cherish what I have remaining of my freshman year. Because I’m a fan of to-do lists, I’ve made one for this month:

_go to Farmer’s Market at least once (which should be tomorrow)
_hike Poly Canyon at night to go stargazing
_wear NO makeup (yes, I agreed to No Makeup May) and gain appreciation for the cosmetic industry
_beach it. and tan.
_curl up with a good book.
_have a picnic!
_meet strangers and start some new friendships.

Hopefully my unhealthiness going into May won’t be a constant. But seriously, who gets sick in the springtime? I don’t think I’ve ever gotten sick after February in my life. I’m kinda bitter about that…especially when head colds seem to get worse as I age. But with an architecture trip to beautiful San Francisco to see sweet buildings and sweet friends, all should be well. I’m still trying to raise support for summer project (57% raised so far), I’m still waking up at 7 am for speech on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and I’m still in shock that I’m only a freshman for 44 more days.

C’est la vie,


how am I?

Posted in life by chapwoman on April 27, 2008

I haven’t updated in a while, so let’s do that:

_I’m on overload.  With work, I mean.  Life is always an endless list of to-do’s, but I’m feeling it hardcore this weekend.  I probably have 6 more hours of FormZ modeling to do for this house I’m researching for architecture and three midterms this week: physics, arch history, and speech.  Pray for me!

_I’m excited! I just downloaded some sweet music via iTunes and I’ve been dancing ever since.  The new purchases range from Journey to Metro Station to Jason Mraz.  I’m kinda music A.D.D. if you couldn’t tell.  But the new Jason Mraz single is called “Details in the Fabric” and you should listen to it NOW.  He finally put some of his journal-savvy thoughts into song, so I’m excited for that.

_I’m confused.  In the realm of a certain crush.  Don’t even get me started.

_I’m annoyed.  There’s been motorcycles driving on campus right out front of my dorm since 7 am this morning.  They’re loud, they’re annoying, and they’re not even motorcycles.  They’re those motocross dirt bike things.  I don’t know who decided to make Grand Avenue a race course for dirt bikers, but uhh, don’t do that again.

_I’m growing.  In my relationship with God.  My friend Kristen & I are being discipled this quarter by Caellin, our bible study leader, and it’s going really great so far.  Both of us as disciples are willing to share and have long conversations with Caellin.  We’re going sharing on Tuesday, so I’m kinda nervous about that.  But there’s a quote I love: “Do one thing everyday that scares you.”  That inspires me to grow, take some risks, and meet some new people around campus.

_I’m jealous. Of Alaska. Because she went to Coachella this weekend and probably had a blast!

_I’m nostalgic.  There’s only 6 weeks left of this quarter, but I remember move-in day like it was yesterday.  I remember boxes stacked five feet tall on my side of the room, I remember not knowing anyone in the dorm besides Katie, Jon, and Cameron, I remember how scared out of my pants I was that first day of architecture.

_I’m bummed that it’s almost over. But

_I’m looking forward to where this quarter’s leading me and how it’s gonna propel me into summer in Colorado.

C’est la vie,

falling into place.

Posted in life by chapwoman on April 16, 2008

The girl who made my sandwich on campus today told me I reminded her of Lindsay Lohan. I’m not sure how I feel about that one…haha.

I’ve gotten Alicia Silverstone from Clueless, Lauren Conrad from Laguna Beach & The Hills, and Drew Barrymore (when I was brunette). But only once did I get Lindsay Lohan and that from my kooky pre-calculus teacher in high school, so I never thought much of it.

But now, shoot.

In other news:

I went to Women’s Retreat for Campus Crusade this past weekend in Santa Barbara and it was just a breath of fresh air. Much needed fresh air. The girls I bonded with, activities we played, songs we sang, all brought me a tidbit closer to understanding who God is. He’s just so…everything. I really can’t explain, but my booklet from retreat has gobs of notes lining the pages.

God is slowly piecing things together for me in terms of summer project, housing for next year, and even the goals I set at the beginning of this year. I think God gets amused by me when I tell Him my plans–I’m finding that He changes them faster than I can explain or comprehend. Just ask me, I’ll tell you exactly who I am, what I believe, what I want; but just wait a couple weeks and ask me again. People say that “you really learn who you are in college,” but I always had a problem with that because I was so sure I already knew.

Yeah, guess not.

I have no idea where I was going with this post, but I guess that’s okay because I have no idea where I am going period. I see all the pieces falling into place, I’m just not sure where they’re gonna land.

C’est la vie,

falling to pieces.

Posted in life by chapwoman on April 9, 2008

I’m not a fan of metaphors/analogies/symbolism, but seriously, this is life right now:

Imagine that you’re on vacation in Hawaii (Kaua’i…even better), and you’re cruising down a beautiful river surrounded by green with peace & quiet, the warm sunshine beaming down on your back. Life is sweet and you don’t have a care in the world.

But before you know it, the boat picks up pace. You hear rumbling and gurgling. Water begins splashing you after colliding with river rocks. Then you realize that within seconds your boat’s gonna spill down a waterfall.
Yeah. That’s what I’m feeling right now.

C’est la vie,

this is what life sounds like:

Posted in life by chapwoman on April 3, 2008

I reacquainted myself with silence today.

After methodically tying my shoe laces & strapping on my iSnug with tunes and all, I began on my not-so-unusual jog out to my not-so-unusual Poly Canyon route. The gravel was damper than usual, since it rained like a mother yesterday, but the air was pleasantly cleaner and crisper than the already clean and crisp air of San Luis Obispo. With the change in atmosphere, I decided to change my usual route by adventuring across a rickety bridge to the jungle of man-made footpaths. I heard that the trails were great for running/hiking. Running? Not so much. What I expected to be casual footpaths were actually strenuous and uphill for a solid 20 minutes (factoring in that I mistook one of the trails and ended up by some random barbed-wire fence on the hillside).

Now when I normally go for a jog, my 30-minute routine begins with “Set Yourself on Fire” by Stars and the “workout” playlist meanders through A-Ha, Avril, Kanye, etc. But those upbeat tunes made for jogging didn’t work here in Poly Canyon on these jogger-unfriendly trails. So what did I do? I turned the iPod off.

It was revolutionary.

I heard crickets croaking then shrubs being tickled by the wind then. Pure silence. I turned around and realized that I had scaled an entire hillside and couldn’t believe how tiny the house at the entrance of Poly Canyon, as well as the student architecture projects, actually were. They were so far away–and I was standing near the peak of a gigantic hill. By myself. With only the crickets and shrubs and pure silence. Not only did I feel an immense appreciation for the landscape of San Luis Obispo, I felt like I was staring God in the face. Without my iPod blaring music into my ears, all I had were those hills nestled behind the noisy campus of Cal Poly–so green, untouched, serene.

It seems like life today is kept in motion because of noise. Whether it be the radio voice we listening to on the way to work, the TV newscaster rattling off the weekly forecast as we get ready for class, or the mp3’s that become a soundtrack for writing English essays and doing calculus homework, our lives are filled with noise. I’m the kind of person who has her iTunes on whenever possible; I can’t even remember the last time I drove my car without the music on. Why work in silence when you can have a great song playing in the background? Because of silence. Because of the natural sounds life offers everyday that scare us to death.

We all need a break from the noise though. In a society where time is money and where cities don’t sleep, it’s absolutely necessary that we SLOW DOWN. And the perfect way to do that is to reacquaint ourselves with silence. Reflect on life at this moment. Sit with whatever is eating away at us. Realize how great God is. Pray.

Let’s spend at least a little bit of time each day by ourselves–not with the trivial noises of life, but with the silent pauses of life.

I will be jogging without headphones more often.

C’est la vie,